The importance of authentic dialogue

As leaders, we often encounter challenges when it comes to unlocking the full potential of our teams. One of the most significant, yet often overlooked, aspects of creating a thriving work culture is the way we communicate. At the core of culture lies the dialogue: how we talk with each other, whether we lift one another up or tear each other down. The way we engage in conversation is a direct reflection of the health of our company culture.

It’s essential for leaders to understand how their own dialogue shapes and sustains this culture. But how do we begin? First and foremost, we need to become aware of whether we are even having the conversations that truly matter to us. Are we engaging in real dialogue, or are we simply conducting monologues? Are we listening to learn or simply to fix or even win? Are we addressing what is genuinely important, or merely talking in circles?

Leaders must ask themselves: What kind of conversations are we having?

Do we focus purely on tasks, or do we also take time to consider the people behind those tasks? It’s about stepping out of the office—both figuratively and literally—and engaging with people on the ground. As a leader, you cannot stay in your office with the door "always open" and expect your team to feel heard.

You need to be proactive and make contact with people where they are, both mentally and emotionally. It’s not just about getting the job done; it’s about how we do it as a team. Do we maintain relationships through healthy communication, or do we allow tension and frustration to build up?

The key ingredients to achieving meaningful dialogues that support a healthy organisational culture are authenticity, accountability and courage.

Understanding authenticity

Authenticity is a key ingredient in any meaningful dialogue. It’s not enough to simply go through the motions of politeness or civility. While maintaining a constructive atmosphere is important, true authenticity sometimes involves discomfort. It means choosing not to ignore our emotions but instead acknowledging their existence, even when dealing with colleagues we may previously have been in conflict with. Ignoring these issues does nothing but keep tension simmering beneath the surface, impacting not only the individuals involved but also the team’s overall performance.

Authenticity doesn’t mean being in the grip of our emotions or oversharing every detail of our personal lives; rather, it’s about addressing the issues that affect our well-being and our ability to perform at work. These tensions — whether they’re personal or professional — affect both our capacity as individuals and as a group.

If I’m unsure of what a colleague is referring to in a meeting but don’t say anything, not requesting clarity is a sign of inauthenticity on my part.

Acknowledging shared accountability

One question I always encourage leaders to ask themselves is: What do I need to address? Meaning that uncomfortable dialogue you know is necessary to have even though you keep avoiding it. Likewise, How can I inspire my colleagues to also be brave?

We all have a tendency to avoid certain uncomfortable truths, sometimes to spare the feelings of others. Accountability is a collective responsibility. We owe it to each other to ensure we’re maintaining clear, honest communication. If there are things we’re avoiding or glossing over, it’s a sign that our dialogue—and by extension, our culture—is not healthy.

Sharing accountability is also sharing an understanding of what is what. It is important to differentiate between facts, feelings and interpretation. Too often, we skip over the facts and jump straight into emotionally driven interpretations, leading to misunderstandings and unnecessary drama. When I conduct workshops, I emphasise the importance of establishing a shared understanding of the facts first before moving into feelings or interpretations.

Having the courage to change the conversation

When we mix avoidance, aggression or defensiveness into our communication, the overall quality of our output as a group or organisation suffers. It takes courage to address these issues, to say: What’s really going on here? What is happening in you now?

This courage fosters an atmosphere where people are willing to share more of themselves, to take risks and ultimately, to help each other.

In one company I worked with, we conducted a team acceleration workshop where the team initially expressed frustration, disappointment and mistrust toward management. But as we created a space for them to go beyond surface-level complaints, they began to open up. Vulnerability followed, and with it came healing. When people experience each other as real, flawed human beings, they move closer together. They begin to see each other as more than just roles or titles.

This process takes time. The stereotypes we carry about one another may have been built over years and require conscious focus to dismantle. But once the masks and defensive barriers come down, breakthroughs happen.

The willingness to be vulnerable allows for authentic connection — and that’s where cultural transformation really begins.

Authentic dialogue is ultimately a leadership task

Ultimately, transforming the way we speak with one another is a leader’s task, but it’s also a personal responsibility. When we embrace authentic dialogue, we not only improve the performance of our teams but also create a healthier, more sustainable work environment. It’s about having the courage to caringly and constructively confront what’s real, what matters, and what needs to change.

The success of any organisation depends on its ability to continually improve. Authenticity in dialogue is the foundation for that success.